[Healing 3/3]Guilt Trips and Affection.

|| Another night had passed, and this time, Damien had spent most of the night asleep, rather than being up and doing whatever. He'd never really forgotten the events of the previous night and how Chava had caused them by leaving the house. He wanted to turn around and start asking questions as soon as they had gotten back, but he figured it would be best to simply relax and ask tomorrow. Well, tomorrow was today, and he wasn't going to let things slide as easily as last night, but it was still a bit too early for that. Now, he was sitting in the grand dining room, eating his breakfast of eggs and bacon, topped off by a bit of blood. As much as he liked eating hearts and flesh and the like, there were still some standard foods that he liked too much to give up entirely. Bacon was one of those. He glanced over at the stairway that led to the upper floor, before shaking his head at himself. Chava would get up whenever she got up, and he would ask then, not any time before.

|| When she woke, she almost expected Damien to be there as well, and couldn't help the small sigh of disappointment that escaped her when he wasn't. She shouldn't have gotten used to it. Taking a moment to herself, she had to mentally prepare. There were no hints, but she knew it was coming, she knew he would ask. She was a little surprised he hasn't brought it up last night. Though, she wasn't complaining that he hadn't. She was probably taking far longer than necessary to get up, but in fairness, she was still hurt. Not that she cared to use that excuse. Scrunching up her nose, she shakes her head. It was nothing to be afraid of. Damien was nothing to be afraid of, to her at least. Nodding to herself at this Chava slips out of bed, and makes her way down to find Damien, who was in the dining room. She curls her arms around herself and offers something of a smile. "Damien," she mumbles as a greeting.

| Damien glances up at Chava, a smile smile on his lips, though his eyes are slightly stern. He waves his hand towards the seat next to him, asking her to sit down. It was better if they were both relaxed for this conversation. He knew his temper limits, but wasn't sure about Chava's limits. "Chava." Pushing his plate away, as it would be rude to eat in such a conversation as this. Setting his eyes on, her he follows her motions, waiting for her to sit down, before saying. "I have a question, and I want you to answer truthfully. Why did you leave the house?"

Chava sits at his motion, leaning back in her chair. At first she meets his eyes, hoping to make this as pleasant as possible. But she could almost feel the tension already. At his first question, right off the bat, she internally winces. She couldn't even answer his first question truthfully. Not yet, at least. She couldn't, it would only make him upset, and then she would never get to see the end of her plan come into action. She doubted he would believe a lie, but even then she was foolish enough to try it. She moves her eyes away from his, looking down at her hands in her lap. "I wasn't doing anything stupid. I wanted... fresh air," she mumbles. Did they really have to do this? "I would have been back soon. I wasn't expecting that creep to get in the way."

Damien raises a brow at the excuse before shaking his head. He sat there for a few seconds pinching the bridge of his nose before sighing. "Look. I care about you. But, that doesn't mean I'm blind or dumb." he glances up, his eyes showing just how easily he saw through her lie. "If you were just getting fresh air, you wouldn't have swore like you did, when you realized I followed you." He had a feeling what she was trying to do. The same thing she tried to do when she got hurt, but he wasn't entirely sure, given that she didn't have any polyjuice while she was out. Either way, he wasn't going to let this go without an honest answer. "I also doubt you would have been back soon. I can hazard a guess at what you were doing." he stares pointedly at her, shifting his seat to better do so, "But I'd much rather hear the truth from you."

Chava shifts in her seat, still staring down at her lap instead of at him. Of course he didn't believe her, it was a thoughtless excuse. But she really had no other excuses. She shrugs her shoulders. Her head was tilted in such a way that allowed her long hair to cover a majority of her face. She figured if she was more hidden, the easier this would be to pull off. "I can't tell you," she mutters suddenly, as if this were final. She didn't want to press the issue, she really didn't, but at the same time she saw no way out of it. "If you think you know, why should I have to say it?" she pouts. She figured he did have an idea of the truth, but she doubted he knew all of it. Even she didn't know all of it- it wasn't a plan very well thought out. She plasters something like a smile on her face. "Can we move on to some other question?"

| Damien lets out a long sigh. He had hoped that maybe she would have told him, but he should have guessed not. He reached out, brushing her hair out of her face, as he wanted to see how she reacted to what he had to say. "If you won't tell me, than shall I say it?" He kept his hand at the ready, just in case she went to put her hair back in place. "I think you were out looking for Lucedio." he leans back, his piece said, before sighing again, as he tried to piece the rest together. "I don't know why. You can't kill him in your state, nor can he be reasoned with. There are no other reasons I can think of, and if there were any other possibilities, you would have said that, instead of 'fresh air.'" Again, he sighs, but raises a brow. "Fine, allow me to ask another question. What would happen to me, if something happened to you?" He stared pointedly again, leaning forward in his chair, and without waiting for an answer he speaks again. "I'll tell you. You seem to think I'll be safe in my home, but Lucedio has expertise in magic that I don't have. He could bring the wards down around my house before a day is up. They're only really meant for the Ministry, I hope you realize?" Tapping on his right arm, he winces slightly before saying. "Even without injuries I'd only hold out for so long. Do you remember what I told you over a month ago? I never could have survived without people around me. Still can't, really. I just get lucky now and then."

Chava pauses, and allows him to speak. The longer he went, the more she started to shake slightly. He had an idea what she was doing, yes. But he didn't know why. She knew why. And he wouldn't like her reason why. She melts into his touch, however, leaning into him and allowing her forehead to rest on his. His next question made it all the worse. That's what he had said, yes, but Chava always thought she could fix that. That with enough training time he could fight Lucedio alone. She had began to feel like she was hindering Damien, she was pulling him back from all he was capable of. For instance, if she hadn't been there at all the first time, Lucedio wouldn't have tried to crucio her, and Damien would never have felt any need to protect her and weaken himself. She felt like a weakness, and she didn't want Damien to have to worry about her. This, of course, only having stemmed from Lucedio's words seeping into her mind from he had tortured her. She was a weakness, like he said, and she mostly only served to be pathetic. She couldn't even defend herself last night against the creep. She sighs, and the words are spilling out of Chava's mouth before she's even conscious of it, along with a few tears. "I... I thought that maybe if Lucedio killed me, he'd be satisfied enough, and would wait... That maybe I could bargain him my life for yours, and give you more time to train to fight him without me... getting in your way..." Chava swallows hard. The truth sounded much worse out loud than it had in her head.

| Damien waited patiently for her to speak, not wanting to rush her, if she spoke the truth. As she spoke his eyes widened, before reaching out with both hands, though not realizing this, moving to pull her into his lap and wrap his arms around her. How could she be so stupid. Did she not realize that her plan would never work. "Don't! Don't let yourself die for me." he started, stumbling over his words. "Lucedio would kill you, then immediately use that opportunity to come after me." What she said next shocked him /almost/ as much as the fact that she was going to try and trade her life for his. "Don't say that. You don't get in my way. I /need/ you. Couldn't survive without you." Both metaphorically and physically, though he didn't say that. He didn't want her to try to use his words in a negative light again. "You help more than you know. And I'm not talking just in combat."

Chava didn't fight him, simply leaning into him once more, her head rested on his shoulder. His words only very slightly made their way through to her, but they were difficult to understand. Her own version swirled in her head, making anything else too hard to believe. But he seemed so upset by her truthfulness... Wiping at her eyes, she pauses another moment before speaking again. "I lied when I said I wouldn't leave the house. I lied when I said I was never planning on dying on you. When I said I wouldn't leave you voluntarily... that was true." She sighs. She wasn't quite sure how to explain, but the truth was spilling out of her now and she couldn't help it. "I don't want... to die," she finally admits, and the words felt strange, coming from her. "But I would be willing to if that gave you a better chance at life." She pulls herself from his lap, making as if to leave the room. She didn't look at him. "I'm a weakness, Damien. I hear Lucedio's voice in my head everyday telling me that. And... and I'm still not going to give up my plan," she admits, wincing.

||Sighs slightly, planting a kiss on her forehead. "I know that now, but don't die. Don't plan on it. If you don't want to die, just stay. Or leave me behind and just forget. He'll never forget me, but given enough time, he might forget you." He cocks his head to the side, listening tor her speak before sighing. He realized that it was the exact opposite that she believed. She thought she was a weakness, but she wasn't. "You aren't my weakness. I'm your weakness. I could name so many ways you've helped me. But I can't name a single time I've helped you." He shakes his head, several times as if trying to think of ways he's helped. "In fact, I've pushed you to do things you didn't want to do. Like kill that girl." He thinks back to the night he was injured, and nearly killed before saying, "I hope you know that if you hadn't been there, if you hadn't healed me when Lucedio stabbed me, I would have died. /You/ helped fend Lucedio off." he shook his head again. No that wasn't quite true. He'd been incapacitated when she fended Lucedio off. "Correction. You /single-handedly/ fended Lucedio off."

Chava continues to pull away from him, gripping at her hair in frustration. He just didn't seem to understand, and she was starting to get shaky. She takes a deep breath, but it didn't quite do much to help her. She rests her head against a wall, before hitting her head against it once. "No, Damien, you don't get it," she mumbles, closing her eyes. She really, really didn't want to get upset, she had no real reason to. "Wanna know how you help? Last night. And the other night when I was an inch from death. You've helped... my sanity." She said this despite the fact her sanity seemed currently in question; it was still true. "Honestly? I'm surprised you haven't kicked me out yet." Her voice was rising in pitch as everything came spilling out of her. "Even you see that you've changed, you're softer, you're..." She pauses, throwing her head against the wall once more. "But hey, what does it matter anyway? Who am I right next to your first wife, right? RIGHT?! How am I to think I'm anything to match her?" Chava laughs, and there it was, out in the open. All of her thoughts out loud.

|| In the beginning Damien had raised his brow thinking on what she was saying. At first he had wanted to refute that if it wasn't for him, she never would have been in that situation. If she never met Damien, she would have been perfectly fine. And he was about to say this, when the bomb dropped. Instantly Damien's face turned into a scowl, and he let go of her, before standing up. His right arm took hold of the plate on the table before whipping it to the left, the plate flying through to doorway into the kitchen before slamming against the far wall. "Don't" he started, his eyes fuming. Sure, at first he thought that no one could compare to his first wife. She was his perfect foil, after all, but he was a far different man than he was back then. Eight years could change a person a lot. And it had been eight years since his first wife had disappeared on him. "Don't bring her up!" And, true, while he was certainly a different person, that didn't make the pain any less easier. Without another word, he left the table, headed to the basement. Forging new weapons seemed a good distraction, though he wasn't paying attention to Chava, figuring she wouldn't follow him after that outburst.

Chava had been visibly taken back in his anger, taking multiple steps backwards, hands curling around herself. Of course what she said made him angry, but she wasn't going to apologise for it either. It was what she had thought for a while, and started to believe, and his outburst didn't help her with that. It seemed almost like proof. And despite his vow to keep, she was legitimately afraid he would come at her and hurt her for what she said. She was almost waiting, without any plans to fight back. The second he moved, she flinches, just to see him head down to the basement. That couldn't have been a good sign. Nonetheless, she pauses a beat before following him down, pushing her way through to meet him once more. But of course, she very much kept her distance from him, noticeably so. "Damien." There were so many things she wanted to say. "How am I supposed to believe that wasn't proof?"

| Damien hung his head over the forge, which in all honesty probably wasn't a bright idea, before turning around and facing her. "Do you even know what happened?" he asked, with a quirked eyebrow. Of course she had followed him, but he had to make her understand why he reacted the way he did. He was still angry, yes, but there was a lot more to the situation than she seemed to realize. He knew she didn't know what happened, because he never told her, but he supposed there was no better time to tell her. If he didn't things could spiral from bad to worse. "When me and my first wife met, it was a crazy coincidence. And she took advantage of that coincidence to try and get me to date her. I was resistant, but she eventually wore me down. Later on I had trouble telling her I loved her. Almost didn't want to. But I did. And immediately after Hogwarts I married her." he sighed slightly as he shook his head. He'd given the basics, but now he was getting to the harder part. "About a year into our marriage, she disappeared. I woke up one morning to not find her beside me. I waited hours, days, months before I realized she wasn't coming back. I knew she would leave one day, how could I not. She told me she would herself." he casts his eyes back up at her, before taking a single step closer to her, "You say you can't compare to my first wife, but I see many similarities. Sure there are some key differences, but the similarities are there. Sure I might not see you in the exact same light. But I do see you in a different light. A just as good light."

Chava took the time to listen to what he was saying, his story, but it didn't do much to change her mind. Sure, she felt bad, but she still felt he wouldn't come to love her like he had his first wife. When he took a step closer, she took another one back. She looks down at her feet, trying to think of what to say, when his last words make her pause. Her head snaps upwards, finally meeting his eyes once more, but hers looked almost cold. "Similarities...? A... just as good light...?" She repeats very slowly, her voice almost a deep growl. Ah, so more proof. What did he even keep her around for really? To help keep himself alive? Perhaps he only needed her for her magic, that seemed rather likely. She wanted to run. "Let me get the straight." She holds a finger up at him. "Wow, does this change things." And not in a good way. "You're saying you see me as /just as good/ as the girl that left you with no explanation, the girl that fucking /told/ you she was going to leave you one day? I'm just as good as her, Damien? That's fucking funny." To meet this point, Chava laughs, but even that was met with her slamming her head into a wall again. Every bad though was consuming her, and it felt like everything was crashing down around her. "Are you with me just to get a little piece of her back?" She sounded next to hysterical. "Maybe you're just with me for my magic? What is it, Damien? REALLY glad to hear you think so highly of me!" Her voice was dripping with cutting sarcasm, her eyes darting towards the door as if she were going to leave the basement, and then the house entirely.

| Damien winces slightly as he realizes just how badly he put that. "Perhaps that wasn't the best way to phrase that." He walks away from her down to the other end of the basement away from the stairs. He wouldn't stop her if she tried to leave. He knew he really fucked up this time. "I loved her. Her leaving hurt, yes but I loved her. I knew her since my second year, and it took that long for me to see her in that light. I didn't get with you because I saw her in you. I didn't see those similarities until after we got together. And just a short time led you here. As far as I'm concerned, /you/ are the only one that matters now. Not her." He sighed and leaned against a wall. "I'm a different person than I was then. If she came back asking to be together, I would turn her down. I will stand by you until you cast me out. Not because of your magic. Or because you remind me of her. But because I love you."

Chava listened to him while gripping her hair at the roots, as if trying to push away a bad headache. His words got through to her, but did he mean them? She supposed he didn't deserve this lapse of her trust, but she couldn't help it. Though she always melted a little, when he said he loved her. But she did move to run, and she darted across the basement, her hand gripping the door as if to escape, leave the house again, if only for a little while. Maybe she would continue with her plan. But the second she opened the door, she pauses, waiting it out. His words echoed in her head, and she slams the door shut once more, making her way back down into the basement entirely, before collapsing at the foot of the stairs. She was exhausted, and she wasn't quite sure what to do, but she knew she didn't want to just up and leave Damien, even if just for a short time. That was never in her plan. She curls into a ball on the ground, and wipes at the tears falling from her eyes. So close, she was so close to giving in once more. "Okay," she mumbles at him from across the room. "I... I'm sorry."

|| At first he hung his head sighing. So she would leave. He guessed he should have seen it coming. So many times fucking up and even the best of people would be worn out. When she returns shock is clearly shown on his face, before rushing towards her. Kneeling next to her, his right hand caressed her cheek. "It's alright." he says, though still clearly shocked about her return. "I fucked up. I only hope I can make that up." He smiles lightly, crossing his legs, as he looks on at her. "And if you ever feel in doubt. Just remember that I'm yours until you cast me aside."

Chava didn't quite look up at him, but sat up across from him, leaning into his touch. He always had a way with her, one touch and she would give in. Her weakness, but not in any bad way. She raises her hand, bringing it to his hand that was against her cheek. She sighs gently, keeping him there. "I don't want you to go anywhere," she admits, keeping her hand on his. "I like you being mine." She brushes her fingers against his on her cheek, before she pauses, freezing up completely. Her eyes snap back up to his, before surveying both of his arms, making careful note of which arm he was using to touch her. She double checks, triple checks, making sure. "Damien," she whispers, fingers lacing through his on his right hand. "Look. Your arm." A small smile breaks out on her face, hoping this would be enough to cheer him up. She remembered earlier too, how he had used both hands to pull her into his lap, then. How had neither of them noticed? "Its working."

| Damien sighs lightly at her words. "I'm glad you think that way. I like you being mine too." He chuckles lightly, just enjoying her being there, until she speaks again. "What? No that's impossible." He glanced at his left arm noticing that he wasn't using that arm at the moment. His eyes instantly snapped to his right arm, following along to the hand that was resting against Chava's cheek. "What..." He spoke, before piecing the puzzle together. It had what a month since he'd been injured? A little over? That was plenty of time for a wound to heal. He still had scars all over, but the wounds themselves were healed. "I suppose it is."

Chava instantly slips her arms around around his neck, pulling close to him. This, this was happier, and this meant better things for the future. One argument was never the end, and besides, it would only cause to make them stronger. She smiles thankfully, bringing his right hand up to kiss his knuckles, before taking his chin in her hand to press an apology kiss to his lips. She lingered for a moment, before kissing him again, this time in happiness for his arm. "I'm sorry for all that," she mumbles. "I love you," she says, before pulling him up to tug him out.